Thursday, December 14, 2017

How to Survive a Confidence Crash - Mel Robbins

Your confidence will crash at some point – everyone’s does. How long this ‘down’ period lasts and how intense it gets depends on you and your coping strategies. A confidence crash is that point in time when you feel worthless, embarrassed, and totally incapable. Situations that can lead to a confidence crash include: A breakup or unhealthy relationship Someone obnoxious at work Falling short of your performance expectations (e.g., being skipped over for a job opportunity) A public mishap Of course, none of these scenarios are the CAUSE of a confidence crash. They are only a trigger. The real cause is hidden inside you – that part of you where processing and interpretation take place – Yup.. it all happens in your head. Here is a short explanation of WHY confidence crashes occur. When something happens, you automatically see it as something really good or something really bad (or anything in between). This calculation is based on how you’ve learned to respond over the years. (If you’re wondering where this came from, do a quick self-check: compare how your reaction to good and bad experiences mimics those of your immediate influencers throughout life). Back on point… the actual trigger of a confidence crash lies in how your interpretation of life events extends to what you think it says about YOU, YOUR CHARACTER and YOUR SKILLS. Therefore it’s not the events cause your confidence crash. It happens because you linked your value as a person to the life event. And if you continue to do this, you’re going to be in trouble – no one’s life is perfect and as planned. Since you likely don’t have a perfect life and given that confidence crashes happen in everyone’s life, it’s time to make a plan on how you can manage your crash – shorten its duration and shorten its intensity.

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