Life often feels ordinary, predictable, even stuck. Yet, the truth is anyone can live an extraordinary life—one that’s just one step beyond what feels normal or safe. This idea is at the heart of Pallas Hupe Cotter’s inspiring TEDx talk, where she shares personal stories, doubts, and lessons learned from living in unique places like Wellington, New Zealand, to raising a family abroad.
If you pause for a moment and ask yourself "Am I living an extraordinary life?" and the answer is anything but a firm yes, you’re not alone. The good news? Cotter shares simple but powerful ideas to help you rewrite your story and take bold steps forward.
Living an Extraordinary Life: A Personal Reflection
Pallas Hupe Cotter grew up with an adventurous spirit thanks to her brave parents who moved the family across the world—sometimes against her teenage protests—to places as diverse as Saudi Arabia and New Zealand. These moves and experiences shaped her belief that anyone can lead an extraordinary life if they dare to try.
Her story isn’t one of heroic struggles or dramatic breakthroughs. Instead, it’s about small but brave choices to embrace change, take chances, and grow. Cotter calls Wellington, New Zealand her home now, a city she describes as "the coolest little capital."
Her parents’ guiding philosophy was simple: don’t let anyone, even a stubborn teenager, stop you from daring to try. This philosophy challenges us to think: Do I believe my life is extraordinary? If not, do I believe it can be?
This honest reflection is the first step. It asks us to set aside comparisons and doubts and really consider if we’re ready to step forward.
Moments of Doubt and Comparison: What Holds Us Back?
We all have them—those moments when life looks dull compared to others. We scroll through social media, watching friends’ adventures and achievements. We see Olympic athletes pushing their bodies to extremes or young innovators already changing the world. Suddenly, our own effort feels small or pointless.
Some common ways these moments sneak in:
- Seeing a friend’s exciting travel photos or career milestones.
- Watching an athlete or speaker showing incredible skill or courage.
- Hearing stories of young people achieving big things.
The real trap happens when these moments turn into beliefs about ourselves. We tell ourselves that our stories don’t matter because we aren’t heroes or “famous” people. That thinking stops us dead in our tracks.
Believing you’re not “hero material” keeps you from living fully.
This feeling is common but not the truth. Cotter found this out firsthand when starting as a speaker. She was told her story was "no big deal" because she wasn’t a headline hero. But she knew every story has value, especially those of everyday courage and change.
The Power of Everyday Stories: Redefining Extraordinary
Cotter’s story isn’t about mountain climbing or inventing new technology. Instead, it’s rooted in everyday experiences—living abroad, working 20 years in TV news, raising kids, and even hosting a children’s show in Saudi Arabia. These moments add up.
Hero stories grab attention, but supporting roles give the world depth and texture. Many ordinary people have profoundly impacted Cotter’s life through their stories. The lesson?
Extraordinary means just one step beyond ordinary—finding meaning, courage, or change in daily life.
She credits her love of words and communication for helping her share those stories better. From a childhood of climbing trees to absorb books in silence, to simplifying her style in journalism, language became a tool to connect and inspire.
Everyday stories matter because:
- They show courage in small but real ways.
- They offer perspectives that can change our thinking.
- They inspire others to take action in their own lives.
This broader view of extraordinary life opens the door for all of us, not just headline heroes.
Three Secrets to Leading an Extraordinary Life
Cotter introduces three key secrets she’s shared with young journalists and anyone seeking confidence and direction. These are simple but profound enough to help anyone get unstuck and move forward.
Tune in to Your Spidey Sense
Your “spidey sense” is your intuition—those gut feelings nudging you toward questions or actions you haven’t explored yet. In her news career, Cotter learned these instincts signal what people want to know or what’s important beneath the surface.
Often, we don’t follow these feelings because a cautious inner voice says things like:
- Don’t rock the boat
- It’s safer to stay where you are
- Things aren’t so bad, why take a risk?
Ignoring that sense leads to regret later, but it also proves the sense was working correctly.
If you notice that spark, pay attention to it. It’s your internal guide pointing to opportunities or changes worth pursuing.
Spot the Signs: Life’s Road Signs
In the movie LA Story, small road signs literally point the way for someone’s life choices. We don’t get light-up signs like that, but life gives us subtle signals.
Cotter shares a story from high school when she noticed a tiny paper taped to a window inviting students to apply to Oxford or Cambridge Universities. Her first thought was “why not try?” even though her louder doubts screamed she couldn’t succeed.
She took the leap and later found herself at Oxford, among brilliant minds whose experiences shaped her forever.
Spotting signs means:
- Listening to small, quiet nudges.
- Fighting against louder, louder doubts.
- Trusting that some moments are meant for growth.
These signs can open incredible doors if you’re willing to stand your ground and take a chance.
Silence Your Fear
Fear can be powerful and noisy. Cotter highlights the phrase false evidence appearing real as a way to recognize fear’s trickery. Although fear sometimes signals danger, it often exaggerates or blocks us from growth.
The key isn’t to ignore fear but to hear it, then turn its volume down. This takes courage and practice.
Cindy Solomon, a public speaker who inspired Cotter, talks about core courage: choosing to be brave despite knowing the risks.
Cotter experienced this when leaving behind a 20-year career to move to New Zealand. She and her husband weighed the consequences carefully, silenced the fears, and leapt forward with their family.
Their story shows it’s possible to rock the boat without tipping it over—and to find new extraordinary adventures.
Your Extraordinary Life Awaits: Taking the Leap
You don’t need to be a headline hero to live an extraordinary life. It starts with redefining extraordinary as a step beyond ordinary, a move beyond your comfort zone.
Remember, it’s okay to question, to doubt, but don’t let those moments freeze you. Trust your intuition, spot the small signs around you, and meet fear with courage.
Stories have the power to inspire change, including your story. Take that first step today and open yourself to new adventures. Who knows? Next year you might be the person inspiring others from a stage, sharing your own idea worth spreading.
Bold moves create lives worth living.
For more about this inspiring talk and similar ideas, TEDx events bring together unique local voices like Pallas Hupe Cotter’s, sharing lessons worth hearing and stories worth telling.
Explore TEDx Talks to discover more on living purposefully and bravely.
You might also enjoy 10 Ways to Live an Extraordinary Life, a practical guide with simple tips to keep your focus on what matters.
How To Live An Extraordinary Life: Anthony Pompliano offers a collection of letters sharing lessons on courage, relationships, and success—perfect if you want to deepen your journey toward an extraordinary life.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QlXre4B3R0
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