A Chance Encounter at JFK Airport
Elizabeth Gilbert’s story took a striking turn in the middle of a busy day at JFK Airport. While preparing to board a flight, she was approached by two tough-talking Italian-American women who recognized her instantly. The taller woman, standing significantly above Gilbert’s height, marched right up and asked, “Honey, I gotta ask you something. You got something to do with that whole ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ thing that’s been going on lately?” When Gilbert confirmed, the woman glanced at her friend and said with certainty, “See, I told you, that’s that girl. That’s that girl who wrote that book based on that movie.”
This brief encounter captures much of what Gilbert’s identity had come to embody—a writer associated with a bestselling phenomenon. While she feels deeply grateful for the breakthrough that Eat, Pray, Love gave her, it also brought unforeseen challenges. Being known so uniquely for one work set expectations and pressures she had to handle carefully moving forward.
The Complex Reality of Success
Success felt like a double-edged sword for Gilbert. On one side, there were legions of fans hoping her next book would recapture the magic of her famous memoir. On the other, there were critics who disliked Eat, Pray, Love and expected failure in her future work as proof that she was not worth the fame.
Gilbert knew she could not win. Under this impossible pressure, she had dark moments where she thought about quitting writing altogether—maybe moving to the country to raise corgis instead. The idea carries a touch of humor but also speaks to a real emotional conflict: how to keep creating when expectation feels crushing.
Her main challenge became clear: she had to make her creativity survive success itself. Instead of being paralyzed by what came next, she found inspiration from an earlier time in her life, recalling how she dealt with failure as a young writer.
Lessons from Early Failure That Stoked Creativity
For Gilbert, writing was more than a career; it was her calling. She dreamed of being a writer all her life and wrote constantly as a child and teenager. Even at that young age, she sent stories—many very bad ones—to The New Yorker, hoping to be discovered.
After college, she worked as a diner waitress while continuing to write, but success did not come easily. For nearly six years, her mailbox was filled daily with rejection letters. The ongoing disappointment was painful. Many times, Gilbert asked herself whether she should quit to avoid the heartbreak.
But the answer was always no. The reason came down to a powerful realization: for her, going home meant returning to writing. Writing was her safe place, her passion, and it outweighed her ego and desire for recognition. In fact, she loved writing more than she loved herself—a vital truth that fueled her persistence.
Here are some key lessons from Gilbert's early struggle with failure:
- Persistence matters — keep working even when success seems impossible.
- Love the work more than the outcome — creativity should come from a place beyond ego.
- Find your “home” — something meaningful that grounds you emotionally and spiritually.
The Paradox of Success and Failure
Years later, even after her meteoric rise, Gilbert found herself identifying strongly with the unpublished waitress she once was. The connection felt strange because her life had changed so much. She had experienced both failure and overwhelming success, yet the emotional disorientation felt similar in both cases.
Gilbert describes the experience this way: life exists along a normal emotional “chain.” Failure launches you into a blinding darkness of disappointment. Success sends you into an equally intense blinding glare of fame and praise. While the world labels one bad and the other good, your subconscious cannot tell the difference. It only senses the distance you are flung from yourself. Both extremes carry the risk of getting lost in these overwhelming emotional states.
The key to recovery is finding your way home again quickly. Gilbert defines this home as whatever you love more than yourself. This can be creativity, family, faith, adventure, or even something as humble as raising corgis.
“Your home is whatever in this world you love more than you love yourself.”
This simple but powerful idea is a pull quote for anyone navigating highs and lows: find that guiding love, and return to it.
Returning to Creativity After Success
After the whirlwind success of Eat, Pray, Love, Gilbert realized she had to do the same thing she had done in the past during failures—head back to work.
In 2010, she published a follow-up book. Critics and readers alike did not embrace it, and it “bombed.” But Gilbert did not falter. Instead, she felt bulletproof, having broken the spell of depending on outcomes for validation. The focus returned to writing for the sake of writing, for the love of the craft itself.
Subsequent work, including a book released just last year, was better received. Still, for Gilbert, the reception remains less important than staying true to her writing home.
Staying grounded in the face of success and failure requires:
- Keep creating regardless of outcomes.
- Love the process, not the applause.
- Consistently return to your craft, your home.
This approach shields creators from the emotional swings of stardom or rejection, letting them build a lasting career.
Finding Your Own “Home” Beyond Ego
Gilbert’s experience points to a universal truth: everyone needs a place or purpose that is bigger than themselves.
This “home” is not addiction or infatuation but something worthy and safe—whether it is family, creativity, faith, service, adventure, or values that inspire deep devotion.
Once identified, imagine building your life upon it and standing firm no matter what life throws at you. When success or failure knocks you off course, the important task is to fight your way back—through discipline, devotion, and respect for what you love.
Perseverance and devotion are key to finding stability amidst any storm.
Confidence from Personal Experience
Gilbert offers reassurance from her long journey: if you find your home and keep returning to it, everything will be okay.
The cycle of creation will continue, with ups and downs, wins and losses. The trick is to keep working, to put your head down, and to honor the process without being swayed by temporary outcomes.
“I can absolutely promise you, from long personal experience in every direction, that it's all going to be okay.”
Her story encourages us to embrace our failures and successes not as ends but as part of a lifelong dance with creativity and purpose.
Elizabeth Gilbert’s journey is a reminder that the true work lies in devotion to your passion and the constant return to what grounds you. No matter where life takes you, keep coming back.
Learn more about creative resilience and how to keep your drive alive even when facing ups and downs by reading Why Failure is Necessary for Creative Growth and exploring insights on The Power of True Passion.
For those looking to build a creative career that lasts, embracing both success and failure with equal steadiness can fuel deeper growth.
Watch the full TED Talk on success, failure, and creativity by Elizabeth Gilbert for more inspiration on this journey.
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